A helpful guide to taking care of parents or loved ones at home

How to make sure your parents can stay at home for as long as possible

How many of us have promised our Mum or Dad that we’d never put them in a care home?

Providing it is safe for everyone involved, keeping your loved one at home can be incredibly rewarding and wonderful thing to do. On the other hand caring for your loved one can be extremely tough and stressful and the risk of family member ‘burnout’ is high.

Making sure you look after your own health and well-being and you are not running around on the go 100% of the time will mean you can keep caring for the person for longer.

Here are our five top tips to taking the pressure off yourself so you can keep your parents at home for as long as possible.

1. Ask yourself how much care is actually needed each day or week

   Before you become so overloaded by providing the care that you don’t have a chance to think about this, take a little time to note down a list of all the things which need to be done and what time of the day or week it is usually done.

   Is any of it needed overnight, does the person need constant supervision to keep them safe?

2. Don’t be a martyr

   If someone asks us if we’re ok, how many of us answer ‘Yes, of course I’m fine’ even if we are feeling completely exhausted. Try to be really honest with yourself about how much of the care you have noted down you can realistically do yourself in the long term, without it affecting your health or well-being.

   Then see if there is a difference between what the person needs and what you can actually do yourself, you may find that this doesn’t tally up.

3. Get some extra help in

   A really good way to reduce the pressure on you is to bring in some extra help which can be daunting at first but with planning and time is will get easier and mean you can take a break and eventually you have regular breaks.

   Here are some ideas to getting started:

   • Share the caring tasks with another family member and ask them to commit to a regular pattern

   • Organise your loved one to go to a day centre, respite centre, weekly coffee morning or something similar to socialise with other people and which will also give you some much needed time off

   • Contact a specialist home-care provider and bring in some professional and experienced care staff to share the work with you like Paragon Home Healthcare. A Paragon Home Healthcare nurse would complete a free assessment of your loved one with you and give you bespoke care options for you to consider with the peace of mind that the care will be overseen by highly specialist and experienced nurses if the situation changes.

   • Try to automate as many errands and tasks as you can, like a regular online shopping order, medication dossette boxes, home-delivered medications, home delivery of continence supplies and lots more. This might take a little time to set up but will be worthwhile in the long run.

4. Ask for help and a carer’s assessment

   You’re probably doing such an incredible job of looking after your parent that nobody thinks to ask whether you need any help.

   Ask your local council for a carer’s assessment. If you are a carer you may be entitled to support from your local council in your own right, even when the person whom you look after does not meet the council's criteria for receiving support.

   If you appear to be in need of support as a result of your caring role then your council should offer you a carer's assessment.

   The carer's assessment will look at whether you have any support needs in your own right because of your caring role, and  how these needs effect your well-being. Here is a useful factsheet for more information: http://www.carersuk.org/files/section/4630/factsheet-e1029--assessments-and-the-care-act-after-april-2015.pdf

   No solution will be perfect but any additional help and support you can get will lessen the load on you.

5. Reducing financial pressures

   Caring for an older adult is expensive and can lead to worrying costs. Reducing these as much as you can should mean you have less to worry about.

   If your loved one is having trouble with everyday tasks such as washing, cooking and getting dressed they may be eligible for means-tested funding from your local authority, or if the needs are more health-related they may be eligible for fully funded NHS Continuing Healthcare from your local NHS Clinical Commissioning Group (CCG).

   Here is a useful link for more information on how to find your local council and how to get a social care needs assessment: https://www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/arranging-care/care-needs-assessment/

   Here is a link to more information on getting fully-funded NHS continuing care and how to arrange an assessment: https://www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/health-wellbeing/health-services/nhs-continuing-healthcare/

Paragon Home Healthcare is led by a specialist and experienced homecare nursing team who will be more than happy to answer any queries you have and to help you navigate the complex field of homecare for your loved one. Call us on 020 3006 2802.

We hope you’ve found this article helpful and we wish you all the best in keeping your loved one at home.